This post is important. Why, Matt, why is the post important? Great question, Matt, I’m so glad you asked because I’m dying to tell you. Lol.
It is very exciting to get feedback on this blog. Feedback is coming in from comments to the blog, comments on Facebook, text messages, etc. That’s awesome. And just to be clear, they are not all rosy but are honest to the point of questioning what’s my intent. Some even offer suggestions to make it better. Those are very helpful. Maybe it would help if I explain a few more things like who this blog is for and how I see it being used.
This blog is for two groups of people.
The first and most important, to me, is that this blog is for victims of what I will call emotional/mental trauma, especially severe and repeated trauma at the hands of another person or people. I make this distinction to say that I don’t know how helpful this blog would be to those who suffered any kind of physical trauma, like a car accident. I don’t know.
The second group of people that this blog is for, is the loved ones of someone who has suffered emotional/mental trauma, especially severe and repeated trauma at the hands of another person or people. It is my hope that by following this blog it will help loved ones to better understand what their victimized loved ones have gone through, are going through, and may continue to go through so that they will be in a better position to offer support to their victimized loved ones.
The big question is how effective will this blog be at doing that? I don’t know but I expect it will be most effective when there is an ongoing dialogue between interested persons. After all, how can I know what to talk about without some kind of feedback or questions sometime or another?
Another question is how will I accomplish my goal? Allow me to share some questions I’ve recently been asked:
- Is this blog for positive, helpful feedback and support -or- is it for venting and sharing? My answer: All of the above. Hopefully I will be more positive and supportive, but I may vent at times. Regardless, I want others to feel that it is safe to say anything, this being especially true for victims. ‘Get it out in the open and let’s talk about it so we can deal with it.’ That’s my motto. LOL.
- Is this blog for bashing, holding onto to anger and resentment? My answer: This blog is for the purpose of helping victims further their healing journey. But it might be necessary, even appropriate, to talk about anger, resentment, and things that need to change to be able to further that healing.
- Will this blog be positive all the time? My answer: I don’t know. There may be times when I feel it necessary to vent, but if I do it is with the hopes that it will offer me and/or others healing.
- Comment from a trusted friend: “For [this blog] to be successful … it needs to remain positive. But honest.” My answer: I absolutely agree.
- Comment from a trusted friend: “The blog was a bit dark and not heading towards healing.” My answer: I can see that but at the moment I believe it’s too soon to make that assessment. I’ve only gotten started and part of what I’m trying to do is to help establish what the problems are and why this is even worth talking about in the first place. I will say this. If my trauma threatens my life, then I know that it threatens other’s lives, too. It’s important to me that other victims know that I get it, I feel the pain that they feel, I know what it’s like. And just as important, or maybe more important, is that there is a way out. There are many ways out. For me, this blog is offering me some hope. I hope it does the same for others.
It’s important to remember that healing from anything is a journey. It’s not something that happens over night and the path that it takes may be unknown and indirect at times. Hence, the need for a blog such as this.
I hope the above helps put this blog into better perspective. Please know that I invite and welcome any comments, suggestions, feedback – positive or negative.
What do you think?
Pope Francis, I appeal you to meet the needs of survivors of clergy sexual abuse by making reparations commensurate with the damage, emotional or otherwise, caused to survivors. I have ideas on how to do this. If you can’t do this, then I respectfully ask, on behalf of the Church, you to stop receiving communion until such time that the Church does. Because until the Church does, it will not be in communion with the saints. Sincere contrition is meaningless without reparations in kind. Demonstrate to the world that the Catholic Church is catholic; that is, the Church Jesus established with Peter as the rock, the first pope; that the Church practices what it preaches.
Thanks for reading.
Wishing you much love and peace,
“Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.” ― Mother Teresa
Consider sharing this blog with others. Victim/survivors of abuses, more often than not, carry this burden silently alone, not knowing how to deal with it or where to turn, but need hope. Loved ones and caregivers also need support. We never know who is or wants to reach out for help. This blog might be of help to caregivers and loved ones of abuse. Silence is deadly and if together we are able to help or save just one life, isn’t that worth it?
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ALL CONTENTS COPYRIGHTED 2019-2021 © by H. Matthew Casey, @Journey from Abused to Joy, https://fromabusedtojoy.com/gallery, firstname.lastname@example.org. All rights reserved. No part of any entry/blog may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the name of the author – H. Matthew Casey, number1advocate, @Journey from Abused to Joy – and a clear link back to this blog: https://fromabusedtojoy.com
An excerpt from the blog The Effects of Sexual Abuse Never Go Away” – “ A child is likely to be left with strong feelings of anger, fear, shame, hurt and disappointment”. That’s some of the reasons why 45 years later I’ve never told my story. Yes, it’s hidden and yes it affects me to … Continue reading Anonymous
Thank you for posting…Sharing intimate details is scary. Thank you for being so brave and for reaching out to others through this blog. I know much of your heart in this blog. Your openness and honesty is quiet beautiful. Thank you for sharing.
‘You make the reality of what you and other victims have suffered so very clear, but we all need to know that it happened. People want to help, we want to speak up and reassure, but sometimes, we just don’t know how. We are learning, hopefully. God bless you and your journey to complete peace.’