Summary: Healthy relationships are so important and go a long way in healing.
Body: Taken from: The Underrated Healing Power of a Healthy Relationship
“Of course, relationships—unhealthy relationships—are also a major source of the problem. In one of the most memorable passages of The Deepest Well, Burke Harris recounts sitting down with 10-year-old Kayla and her mom to identify the cause of a severe asthma flair-up. After running through all the typical triggers without success, Kayla’s mom said, “Well, her asthma does seem to get worse whenever her dad punches a hole in the wall. Do you think that could be related?”
That question—whether unhealthy human relationships can lead to physical ailments—drives Burke Harris’s career and animates her book. As she explains, traditional medical approaches and standard therapies came up short in explaining or alleviating her young patients’ suffering. “Trying to treat these children felt like jamming unmatched puzzle pieces together,” she writes. “The symptoms, causes and treatments were close, but not enough to give that satisfying click…I asked myself again and again: What’s the connection?”
As humans, the relationships we form with other people are vital to our mental and emotional wellbeing, and really, our survival.
Humans have an inherent desire to be close to other people. To connect and build relationships. While a man stranded on an island, talking to a volleyball (you remember the movie!) isn’t necessarily “healthy,” his compulsion for company is. That’s because the fact of the matter is, healthy relationships (romantic relationships, friendships, familial relationships — they all count!) can help make for a healthier overall life. But what exactly does a healthy relationship look like?
A positive relationship can be shared between any two people who love, support, encourage and help each other practically as well as emotionally. In no particular order, people in healthy relationships tend to:
- Listen to each other
- Communicate openly and without judgment
- Trust and respect each other
- Consistently make time for each other
- Remember details about each other’s lives
- Engage in healthy activities together”
This is me, Matt, writing: Obviously not all relationships are healthy. However, it is good self care to avoid unhealthy relationships. They can sap the life out of you. Though I’m not a big fan of cut-offs, there are times when it’s appropriate. Consider the following when evaluating relationships:
You were born to be loved and you deserve to be loved. If are in a relationship where you are not being loved, think about the above. Choose healthy relationships. Love yourself. Recovery depends on it.
Thanks for reading.
Wishing you much love and peace,
“Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.” ― Mother Teresa
Ps: Have words of encouragement or a testimony to share? Does/has this blog helped you in some way? Know of additional, valuable resources? Suggestions for topics? Post a comment or you can also send me a private message by using the “Contact” page on my website or message me on FB.
Consider sharing this blog with others. Victim/survivors of abuses, more often than not, carry this burden silently alone, not knowing how to deal with it or where to turn, but need hope. Loved ones and caregivers also need support. We never know who is or wants to reach out for help. This blog might be of help to caregivers and loved ones of abuse. Silence is deadly and if together we are able to help or save just one life, isn’t that worth it?
Not signed up? Please do. Look for the “Follow” link and complete the information requested.
Signature Block – No Pope
ALL CONTENTS COPYRIGHTED 2019-2021 © by H. Matthew Casey, @Journey from Abused to Joy, https://fromabusedtojoy.com/gallery, firstname.lastname@example.org. All rights reserved. No part of any entry/blog may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the name of the author – H. Matthew Casey, number1advocate, @Journey from Abused to Joy – and a clear link back to this blog: https://fromabusedtojoy.com
An excerpt from the blog The Effects of Sexual Abuse Never Go Away” – “ A child is likely to be left with strong feelings of anger, fear, shame, hurt and disappointment”. That’s some of the reasons why 45 years later I’ve never told my story. Yes, it’s hidden and yes it affects me to … Continue reading Anonymous
Thank you for posting…Sharing intimate details is scary. Thank you for being so brave and for reaching out to others through this blog. I know much of your heart in this blog. Your openness and honesty is quiet beautiful. Thank you for sharing.
‘You make the reality of what you and other victims have suffered so very clear, but we all need to know that it happened. People want to help, we want to speak up and reassure, but sometimes, we just don’t know how. We are learning, hopefully. God bless you and your journey to complete peace.’